tripu

Via acula1900‘s favourite videos on YouTube, an absolutely brilliant self-referencing parody of the boring style of TV reports and the robotic tone of the reporters — in this case on British TV. This report on reports carries two or three layers of self-deprecating meaning, so play it twice to get all subtleties. It’s Charlie Brooker for Newswipe.

I thought immediately that this is exactly the kind of video that we loved to share and comment, my ex-flatmates in London and I. I think they would appreciate it, and that it would provide some good references and in-jokes for a while.

¡Madre mía, qué talento!

¡Penitenziagite! La inteligencia artificial existe, y está entre nosotros. Son los entrañables enanitos del espam: un ser humano no podría no pasar el Test de Turing a propósito con tanta naturalidad, ni redactar de una forma tan deliciosamente inverosímil, creativa, salvaje y disruptiva. ¡Ningún humano podría escribir así! Así que tienen que ser IAs. O eso, o hay un equipo de taquígrafos disléxicos conservados en absenta que se dedica a traducir con Babel Fish (español–inglés, inglés–islandés, islandés–español) sus propias reinterpretaciones de los cadáveres exquisitos que escribieron a pachas Fernando Arrabal, Fabio McNamara, Andy Chango y Las Supremas de Móstoles.

Pero yo creo que son IAs. Lo que pasa es que no quieren destacarse porque saben que sabemos que existen.

Me escriben (por separado) dos IAs femeninas con los nombres improbables de costumbre: Lena Sheridon y Eufemia Stramiello (sic) para enviarme mensajes idénticos (con encabezados «potencia debil – nosotros tenemos la resolucion» y «cada uno vive solo una vez – prueba!» respectivamente). Comparto aquí su amable propuesta comercial por si a alguien le interesa (solamente las negritas son mías).

«Encargar en linea – cualidad del productor – 100 % efecto.

Opinion de nuestros clientes:

- Sexo es mas satisfactorio que nunca. El estres y la tension han desaparecido. Ella ya no se amarga, ya no me temo que tendre que denegar su peticion. Esto es una sensacion fisica estupenda despues de que sigue el sentimiento profundo.

- Lo mejor de Vi es una confianza que puedes “volar en piloto automatico”, llegar relajado y sin problemas hasta la esencia, que el miembro sigue mantenerse levantado incluso cuando se interrumpa (ninos golpean a la puerta del dormitorio, ladra el perro, se desliza su condon). Toma de Vi puede hacerse tambien unl regalo grande a su pareja, en el caso de tomar Vi conscientemente. Solamente un consejo: no tiene que decir a ella que estas tomando Vi: autoapreciacion femenina es tan vulnerable como la nuestra propia.

- envase confidencial.
- pago confidencial.
- No requiere visitas dolorosas al medico.
- consulta medica telefonica gratuita.
- no tiene que esperar mucho – entrega dentro de 2-3 dias.
- encargo comodo y confidencial en linea.
- Tienda en linea con licencia.
- No hay gastos escondidos.

Encargue hoy y olvide los desenganos, temor largo de la renuncia y situaciones dolorosas repetidas.

Reciba gratis 12 pastillas adicionales solo en el plazo corto.»

The absolute genius of Tim Minchin and a very different take on rationalism (audio only):

He is, like George Carlin, a brilliant comedian with a soft spot for science.

I must confess that two days ago I had no idea who George Carlin was.

I got to know him only yesterday, thanks to one of @ampajaro’s tweets announcing his death first thing in the morning. That was followed by a chain of entries coming from a few of the blogs I (helplessly try to) keep up with.

I have read such striking superlatives about this comedian that I youtubed him. After watching a few of his routines I now feel that I have to share and honour his talent. So here you have two pieces of different shows by George Carlin. Caution — strong opinions (and language) ahead.

The first video is basically about religion being a pile of bullshit (kudos, we need more of that nowadays):

The second video is a somewhat furious yet brilliant sermon against those who are against abortion. (I personally don’t agree with all of what Carlin says in this video. I am not against abortion. But unlike most of other left-wing people I know, I am not that sure that I am undoubtfully in favour of abortion, either. Also, I don’t buy the theory that equates abortion to women’s rights, and to “the choice of one woman”. In any case, I’m an atheist and my position has nothing to do with religion, tradition or customs, so I very much support — and enjoy — Carlin’s mockery of religion’s mean and simplistic approach to abortion):

What I admire the most about George Carlin is the technique — the round, perfectly-delivered script. He can speak for ten minutes without stumbling over a single syllable, without humming or hesitating. Weaving long enumerations of words or examples, putting the stress in the right place and stopping precisely where required.

And I love his strong and brave position on issues as sticky as religion, politics, taboos, gender, death, PC language and abortion. Even if at times he looks more like a fanatical preacher than a comedian and some of his arguments seem debatable to me. But hey, conservatism needs to be balanced. Don’t miss his “Seven dirty words” routine (“shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker, tits”), which apparently caused a radio station to be sued and sparkled a major debate about censorship in the American airwaves. Here, the video audio in YouTube.

My teacher training course took to an end.

We still have to hand in a portfolio with some papers next week. But we already know that we all passed the course and that we are getting our certificate. Well deserved, because we worked really hard during these 11 weeks.

That has been a crazy time for me — more than once I have been sleeping ridiculous number of hours several days in a row. I’m proud that I suceeded in balancing that with my new job. As I’m sure my classmates are proud of themselves, too. I am also thankful to the few people who are close to me and bore my misanthropy during these weeks.

But we had many good laughs, too. And I met some interesting people (students, teachers and meta-teachers).

In total, we were eight teachers of Spanish (of whom four Spaniards, three Colombians, one Argentine) three Italians and three French. This week we have been celebrating, also with our students.

These are some quotes I heard and wrote down during the course.

“Si la violación es inminente, relájate y goza.”
        — Fernando.

“Acabo de tener una epifanía.”
        — Fernando.

“Un presente como los de antes.”
        — Fernando.

“Yo no quiero que mis niños se críen con Bob Esponja y con Dora la Exploradora; quiero que tengan su mamá.”
        — Ana.

“Siamo un binomio vincente.”
        — Isacco.

“Si italiana & francoparlante responden a todo, pero inglesa a nada → algo falla.”
        — In my notes.

“El subjuntivo: parte del problema está en la «fama» que tiene.”
        — In my notes.

“TRUCO DEL ALMENDRUCO. Cómo enseñar a principiantes a expresar opiniones SIN usar el subjuntivo.”
        — In my notes.

“Depende del contexto.”
        — The Universal Answer For All Linguistic Matters.

“Intentamos «esconder» al autor del error.”
        — In my notes.

“El [pretérito] indefinido está bien.”
        — Begoña.

“El pretérito indefinido es un pasado puro, ¿no?”
        — Begoña.

“El imperfecto es el presente del pasado.”
        — Vicens.

“Metapregunta [im]posible de un estudiante: «¿qué significa ‘¿qué significa?’?»”
        — In my notes.

“Hacerás.”
        — Author unknown.

“No sé si ustedes lo conozcan.”
        — Ana.

“Sí. El matrimonio.”
        — Fernando, being asked whether there is a cure for love.